See. I knew I would forget about doing this. However, in my defense it was a pretty busy two weeks. Mom is still sick. Work got super hectic. Also, new shows to binge.
As December has moved past me, I have had to deal with a variety of emotions, as well as others. Seeing the vulnerabilities of my mother, humbled me and made me feel horrible. I am so used to my mother being the strong one and now she is the one who needs the comfort and I honestly don’t know what to do majority of the time for her. Not only that, the fact that I have seen so many of my Facebook friends and real world friends going through hardship brings me down to earth that not everything is about me. That God is busy working on other’s prayers and that the strength that He gives to my mother and myself should not be taken lightly.
Prayers. I have been praying to Him for weeks and there are times when I am just ungrateful. But I am mostly thankful for giving my mother strength and for us to keep fighting and making others fight with us to get my mother on the right path. I don’t like quitting, I like going on my own terms and that is what I want for my mother. I want her to go when SHE is ready and when she feels she has lived the life she has always wanted.
She is and will always be my hero. This holiday season really isn’t much of a holiday, but I am still going to say thank you to the man upstairs and for His Son he gave to us.